Ghanaian parents have perfected the art of emotional blackmail to a level that deserves academic recognition.
It is a skill so refined, so deeply embedded in our culture, that every child grows up experiencing it. From exaggerated success stories of their youth to the deceptively innocent “Have you eaten?” question, they wield guilt and obligation like seasoned professionals.
“When I Was Your Age…”
One of the most common—and possibly most infuriating—phrases every Ghanaian child has heard is: “When I was your age, I had built three houses.” Somehow, every Ghanaian parent was a prodigy, achieving superhuman feats of success at a young age.
They claim to have owned businesses, built houses, and even raised entire families by the time they were in their early twenties.
Of course, no evidence of these alleged houses ever emerges, and yet the weight of these claims hangs over children like an eternal standard they can never match.
It is the ultimate tool of comparison, meant to spur motivation but often leaving young people frustrated, questioning if their parents lived in an alternate universe where success came overnight.
The Hidden Meaning Behind “Have You Eaten?”
On the surface, the phrase “Have you eaten?” seems like an act of care. However, every Ghanaian child quickly learns that this is not a genuine inquiry about their well-being—it is a disguised command. The real meaning is: “I have work for you.”
The moment you answer “Yes,” the follow-up request arrives: “Then come and sweep the compound.” Answer “No,” and you are still not safe: “Then go and fetch water before you eat.” It is a masterful psychological trick, trapping children into chores before they even realise what is happening.
Guilt as a Parenting Strategy
Ghanaian parents also love to remind their children of the sacrifices they made. “Do you know how much I suffered for you to go to school?”
This one statement is enough to make any child feel indebted for life. It does not matter if you are 10 or 30 years old—your parents will remind you at every opportunity that you owe them everything.
Even simple choices, like deciding to rest, can be turned into guilt trips. Try sleeping past 6 AM, and you will be greeted with, “You are still sleeping? When I was your age, I was already at the farm by 4 AM.” The message is clear: any attempt at self-care or relaxation is unacceptable.
The Love Beneath the Tactics
For all their expert-level emotional blackmail, Ghanaian parents ultimately mean well. Their guilt-inducing stories and disguised commands are rooted in love, discipline, and a desire to see their children succeed.
The exaggerated tales serve as motivation, and the hidden requests for help reinforce the importance of responsibility.
While their methods can be frustrating, they also shape resilience and a deep sense of duty.
Ghanaian parents may not always express affection in the most straightforward ways, but behind every complaint, every dramatic story, and every cleverly disguised chore lies an undeniable truth—they will always want the best for their children, even if it means employing a little (or a lot of) emotional blackmail.
