In Ghana, the phrase “I’m coming” does not always mean what it should. In fact, it is one of the greatest mysteries of our social interactions.
When someone says, “I’m coming”, are they ever really coming back? Or is it just a polite way of disappearing indefinitely? Let’s conduct a scientific investigation into this national habit.
The Literal Meaning vs. The Ghanaian Reality
In normal circumstances, “I’m coming” should mean “I’ll be back in a moment.” But in Ghana, the phrase has evolved into something far more complex.
- The Vanishing Act: You ask a friend to stay put while you get something, and they confidently say, “I’m coming.” You blink, and they are gone—never to return.
- The Perpetual Wait: Someone tells you, “I’m coming”, and you wait for what feels like an eternity. At some point, you start questioning your own reality. Were they ever here to begin with?
- The Disguised Goodbye: Sometimes, “I’m coming” is just a soft, guilt-free way of saying “I’m leaving and don’t want to explain.”
The Science Behind “I’m Coming”
Through extensive social observation (and personal experiences of being abandoned), we can categorise “I’m coming” into different levels:
- Level 1: “I’m coming” (30 seconds to 2 minutes) – This person is actually coming back. Rare, but possible.
- Level 2: “I’m coming” (10-30 minutes) – This person remembers they promised to return but got distracted.
- Level 3: “I’m coming” (1 hour and beyond) – This person forgot they even spoke to you.
- Level 4: “I’m coming” (Forever) – This person has left the planet. Accept it and move on.
A National Habit?
Why do Ghanaians use “I’m coming” so loosely? One theory is that we like to soften the truth.
Saying “I’m coming” sounds better than “I’m leaving you here to fend for yourself.” It allows for a smooth escape without confrontation.
Another theory is that it’s a deep-rooted cultural instinct.
Just like how “I’m almost there” usually means “I haven’t even left home yet,” “I’m coming” has evolved into a statement of convenience rather than fact.
Should We Stop Saying It?
Probably not. “I’m coming” is part of Ghanaian culture, and at this point, everyone knows not to take it at face value.
The real solution? Just assume that if someone tells you “I’m coming”, they might—or might not—be back. Plan accordingly.
