Counselling psychologist and educationist, Counselor Angie, has cautioned against pressuring a 32-year-old expectant mother to reconcile with her own mother, stressing that the estrangement is rooted in deep emotional trauma rather than defiance.
Speaking on Let’s Talk show on Joy Prime on Tuesday, she explained that the woman had disclosed childhood sexual abuse but was met with disbelief from her mother, an experience she described as a profound betrayal.
“It’s about betrayal. She was betrayed at a time she needed her mother the most—someone who was supposed to protect her,” she said, noting that the emotional wound continues to affect interactions as the woman prepares for childbirth.
Counsellor Angie stated that the primary concern should be the expectant mother’s emotional safety. She warned that the mother’s denial of the abuse and insistence on an apology make any engagement potentially harmful.
“The mother is the trigger point when it comes to her emotional safety,” she noted, adding that forcing reconciliation at this stage could undermine the woman’s stability and health.
On the issue of forgiveness, she stressed that it cannot be imposed where harm is not acknowledged.
“Forgiveness is not an event; it’s a process—it takes time,” she said, cautioning that pressure to “move on” without accountability may deepen the trauma. She described the woman’s decision to maintain distance as an act of self-care, not disrespect.
Highlighting the importance of mental well-being during pregnancy, Counsellor Angie urged family members and healthcare providers to prioritise the woman’s peace of mind.
“Choosing peace over pressure is not disrespect. The lady has to choose peace,” she said, noting that prolonged emotional stress can pose risks during late pregnancy.
Given the strained relationship, she advised building alternative support systems for the postnatal period, including trusted relatives, family friends, or caregivers who can provide a stable and supportive environment for both mother and child.
She noted that any support plan must respect the woman’s boundaries rather than rely on uncertain reconciliation.
Counsellor Angie added that the focus must remain on safety, healing, and practical support, saying that the expectant mother’s mental health and the safe arrival of her baby should take precedence over attempts to enforce family unity.
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Source:
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