Relationship and Marriage Counsellor Esther Assana has emphasised that marriage requires teamwork and personal readiness, describing it as a process rather than a destination.
Speaking on Joy Prime’s Let’s Talk show, she urged individuals to develop themselves fully before entering marriage.
“Let’s understand that marriage is a process”.
She stressed that individuals must be complete within themselves and should not assume marriage will automatically fill personal gaps.
“You must be complete in yourself. You should not always feel inadequate thinking that marriage will make you adequate is a lie. No”.
Esther highlighted the importance of personal growth and preparedness, including self-knowledge, aspirations, financial independence, character and interpersonal relationships.
“First know who you are. You know your physiology. You know your background”.
She explained that financial independence is important because circumstances in marriage can change. She advised women to have sufficient financial resources before getting married, stressing personal capacity rather than a specific amount.
“You must have a sufficient money. Sufficient money that you be able to rely on to build as a capital for you to work for you personally”.
Esther also warned that a woman’s inner circle can significantly influence her marriage and urged women to be careful about the company they keep.
“Those kind of people you need as a woman talking as ladies you need to watch out, you need to cut them off. It’s as simple as that”.
According to her, being mindful of friendships forms part of understanding one’s identity and maintaining clear boundaries.
She added that marriage demands sacrifices and often requires a shift from a carefree single lifestyle.
“Am I ready to sacrifice certain things? Am I ready to stop my life, my outing with friends, my unnecessary spending?”.
Esther also stressed that love alone cannot sustain a marriage, noting that commitment and maturity are necessary for it to thrive.
“Love is just a feeling, my dear, it will clear off. It will, it will just clear. Marriage is reality. It’s maturity. All those butterflies cannot sustain marriage at all. We need to work at it. We need to sacrifice for each other”.
She concluded that marriage can succeed when couples work together with a shared vision and commitment.
“It’s a teamwork. Let’s come together. Let’s talk about it. Let’s see where we are going. The vision we have. Let’s come together and work at it. It will work. Marriage is workable”.
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Source: www.myjoyonline.com